Matthew 1:19-20
Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. But after he had considered this, and angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit” (NIV).
My first thought: “Divorce is not an appropriate Advent topic.” Yet it is a relevant Advent topic, because had the angel of the Lord not given encouragement and a revelation to Joseph, and had Joseph not obeyed the angel of the Lord, Jesus would have been born into this world having parents who were divorced.
Matthew calls Joseph “her husband” in verse 19. 2,000 years ago in the Jewish culture, if you were engaged, you were legally married, which is why Joseph would have needed a “divorce” to end it. So here they are legally bound and on the doorstep of the wedding, and then Joseph learns his wife is pregnant.
Under the Mosaic Law, the sentence against Mary would have been death, as is stated in Leviticus 20:10. Obviously the Jewish leaders were not following this regulation of the Mosaic Law which was surely unpopular. But we learn here Mary would have been publicly chastised, and it would have probably been a stigma for her which may have resulted in not being able to get another husband of good character.
Interesting that Matthew says Joseph was a righteous man, thus we know that Jesus had a special father. Yet even he had decided to divorce his bride, apparently without talking with her.
My parents are divorced, and I was terribly hurt by their long separation and subsequent divorce. Once I started following Jesus, a healing process began. I consider in retrospect that I was a follower of Jesus for about a decade before I was ready for a healthy marriage. God gently worked to bring healing in my life. Then in the summer of 2000, there was an incredible event of healing when I took the afternoon to pray on the grass beside the library where my parents first met. That afternoon, I forgave my parents for the sins they had done which led to their divorce. The result was awesome: the capability to live free from the hurt and anger which had resulted from my parent’s divorce.
But much damage was done in my life which I still have to deal with all these years later. For example, to this day I still have the dream of being married, though I remain single at an older age where most women I know have been married for a long time.
And now I recall a fact I have not thought of in a long time: After my parents got divorced, Christmas time was a bit depressing for me. In my youth, Christmas had been the most exciting family day of the year. But once my family was broken, the special day was no longer the same. I remember one year in college where I slept in rather than waking up on time with my younger sister to get presents.
Praise be to God that once I became a Christian, Christmas swiftly gained a growing significance which was not tied to my past family Christmases. Christmas became about Jesus, my Savior and Lord.
As we continue with the Christmas story here on the second Sunday of Advent, please know we Christians still have hurts and there is nothing unusual about hurts from family. If you have such hurts, you may need to talk with a friend about such, yet first and foremost it is best to talk with God. Tell Him about your hurts. Listen to Him for help and for healing.
We all need forgiveness from Jesus, and we all need to forgive people who have hurt us, including our parents for those of us who were hurt by our parents. Forgiving requires dependence on God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit, the One who is merciful.
What better Advent activity than to gain more healing, so we may be better prepared for the blessings of Christmas after this extremely challenging year of 2020.
Hunter
Question for pondering:
1.) Have you ever had a disappointing Christmas?
